ONCE MORE INTO THE BREECH By Michele Lellouche mdanl@attbi.com RATING: R (language) CATEGORY: Season 10. Sorta SPOILERS: Do we really have those any more? DISCLAIMER: 20th Century Fox, Chris Carter, 1013 Productions own the rights to THE X-FILES; all the real people own rights to themselves, I think ARCHIVE: Of course, of course. FEEDBACK is cherished lovingly and responded to promptly. Cookies & milk or pizza & beer are available, whichever you prefer... AUTHOR'S NOTE: No real people were harmed in the making of this fic. Apologies to them -- this bears no more than superficial resemblance to them. More Author's Note at the end, if you get that far... Once More Into the Breech By Michele Lellouche "Chris? Chris, man, pick up, I know you're there...I hope you're there." Chris Carter stared at the clock. Sure, he had wanted to get an early start for a wonderful, freeing day of surfing on Bondi Beach but 2:30 AM was too early. And Vince Gilligan's Virginia drawl sounded strangely agitated. "Vince? What--" "You've got to get back here -- right now, yesterday, today, whatever day it is there." "Why? You're out a job, I'm out of a job." "No, we're not." "What do you mean, 'no, we're not'?" Carter sat up in bed. "_Firefly_ has turned into a black hole--Joss Wheddon can't deliver and Fox's brought us back." "Vince, I told you about staying out of those mushrooms Aaron Sorkin gave us." "I'm not kidding, Chris! He caved and we're back." "Sonofabitch," Chris swore softly. Then he exploded. "Fuck Wheddon! I hope he gets barbequed by GLAAD for killing the Tara character! What the hell are we gonna do, Vince? Frank's off with Michael Mann, John's over at Enterprise--it's you and me! We're it!" "No, we're not." "And forget about the actors!" "You sitting down?" "Of course. If I stood up, my legs would buckle." "David's on board." "Be serious." "Tea talked him out of that Ellroy movie after they saw the second script. Gillian's play is delayed. She's back, if we change some things. David wants to do more writing and directing." "I can work with that." "Robert's in South Africa but I called him and he nearly blew out the phone--he is ready to come back. I left Annabeth a message." "So you, me, David can write, Kim?" "Ready to kick it in the ass." Carter closed his eyes. "I'm still hoping this is some awful dream." Vince Gilligan, across the Pacific and away from his boss's keen gaze, decided not to mention his radical idea for the season premier just yet. "Think positive. We're back on Friday nights and we're back in November." "I'm going to back to sleep now, Vince. I'm making a note so I'll get a flight out tomorrow. Today. Whatever. Don't agree to any of Sandy Grushow's terms until I talk to him." Carter managed a half an hour of sleep, then gave up and did his best Amazing Race imitation and went to the airport for a flight. Once he had one, he found coffee and a place to plug in his laptop and waited for his flight. As he expected, the trade websites were buzzing with the rumor that X would be returning for season 10. Every article noted that critics and fans had ended the ninth season saying that the show was on its last legs and the finale unfulfilling. He wondered what in the world had possessed the brain trust (and he used the term loosely) at Fox to bring them back. With a sigh, he logged into his email. Vince's email was in his usual indefatigable style, promising that a premiere was already roughed out, David had some ideas and that there were a few more scripts and writers in the pipeline. His former assistant Mary Astoudorian (now president of the company) promised in her email that she was rounding up a crew. The last was from Robert in South Africa, declaring himself "completely psyched" for season ten. By the time he dragged himself onto the plane, he could almost convince himself that he would be "completely psyched" about a season ten. . After what passed for an in-flight lunch was served, Carter logged into the Net once again and began reading the outrage and outright scorn being heaped on all their heads by the fans in the various newsgroups. On reading the hundredth post questioning all of their decision making processes, he logged off and stared at the screen. In a few moments, the goofy alien spaceship screen saver took over. As he watched the little ship flit about, he realized how tired he was of all of it. Sick of keeping the mythology straight (writing the finale had nearly killed them all), sick of hearing people complain about the mythology. He sighed, realizing this was one of those days when he was sick of everything X, so he simply shut down the computer and closed his eyes. Maybe it would all look better after a nap. ###################### "Vince, he is not going to go for this, I'm telling you," Kim Manners tapped the draft script that Gilligan had prepared. "I don't see why not. It fixes all our problems. David, didn't you say Gillian loves the idea?" Duchovny looked up from his perusal of the latest version. "Yeah. Hell, I love it too. It fixes all our problems just perfectly. Not only that, if we do get to make movie 2, it sets it up neatly." "Did you see the trades this morning? They're going to make a sequel to Undercover Brother and it opened at, what, 9 million? We'll make movie 2," Vince said assuredly. "Anyway, I'm going to email it to Robert in a few minutes. I think Annabeth will like it." "We're gonna get barbequed for this. You weren't in the business when Bobby came out of that shower on _Dallas_," Manners warned. "Kim, they're gonna barbeque us in any case so let's do something we like for the good of the franchise. If it all falls apart, so be it. Besides, Felicity just spent the last three weeks of the show going back and forth in time, and West Wing had a show that was 'out of the timeline.' Hey, the Star Trek people do it all the time." "We can call John and get a few firsthand pointers," David said snidely. "When are you going to spring this on Chris?" "He said he'd come straight here after he gets off the plane, so I'll just hit him when he's tired and defenseless." When the wheels slammed down in Hawaii, Carter started awake, jerked against the seatbelt, with a knot in his stomach until he realized that the plane was actually landing, not crashing. As he was coming back to reality, he tried to hang on to bits of his dream. Mulder was back in Oregon, describing his very long involved dream to Scully, then it was a jumble of Krycek, Doggett, the Gunmen, Skinner...he couldn't keep it straight but he grabbed the fax of his electronic ticket from his backpack and started scribbling whatever he could remember. When he got on the next flight, he'd start sorting it out, make it coherent. At Honolulu International, he found a phone to call into 1013. He nearly fell off his perch when David picked up the phone. "1013 Productions, will this be takeout or delivery?" "David, working on your next career?" "Hey, Chris, love you too. What kind of food do you think we should sell?" "I'm thinking a fish taco franchise, which is probably the only job I'll be able to get after this week. I plan to give Sandy a piece of my mind when I get back. By the way, what are you getting out of this?" "They're backing up a dump truck full of cash to my door. Kim's deciding what we're going to do over at Joss Wheddon's bungalow, as revenge. You have any suggestions?" "Not over a phone line that could be tapped. You guys better not go before I get back, though, I've got some definite ideas. Since you're there, where're Vince, Mary and the rest of the usual suspects?" "Vince and Mary are making headway lining us up a crew, but we should have good news by the time you land. I've got some myself-I talked to Steve Soderburgh and he's interested in directing an ep. So's Clooney, if he can fit in the time." "Could be interesting-the year of famous people. With you, me, Vince and Kim, that's half the season directed. Are we renewed for all 22 or what?" "Vince said he was going to let you and Sandy duke it out on that one." "Smart man. If we're going to relaunch this juggernaut, we all need to sit down and decide how we're going to play this. I sure as hell wish Sandy had called me first." "Well, Fox owns it, as they keep telling us. I wonder what they'd do if none of us showed up?" "This is the first time we can all three negotiate as one," Carter mused. "Think on that, David. Think what lovely things we can get out of them. Starting with decent promotion." "Small potatoes, as Vince would probably say. Anyway, think on a direction for us while you're flying in. Why don't you scope out Hawaii as a location for us?" "Hey, note that for our discussion with Sandy Grushow, say we could shop ourselves to CBS, they've got facilities in Hawaii, all empty." "I think I love that idea. You can teach us all how to surf big waves." "David," Chris hated to derail the friendly conversation that reminded him so much of the old days. "Are you serious about being here for the whole season? Is Gillian?" "Chris--" "C'mon, David, I'm sitting here in this airport, flying back to a town full of trades who think we're sell outs or idiots or worse to come back, because Fox can't develop a decent pilot. I log onto the Net and see myself mangled all over X-Files fandom- -all of us. We've got less than no time to rehire a crew, write and plot out a season--" "That's why, y'know. My manager called me last night with rumors, about how bad the buzz was, then Vince called, in that plaintive voice of his, y'know the 'just one more shot, just say the words the way I wrote them' voice?" "Just let me do a Cops crossover," Chris added. "He called and said that the show, against all odds, was coming back and that you and he were the only ones around. And then he said it was going to be like the old days--no money, no respect- -and I'm thinking Vince wasn't there at the very beginning, when we really did have no money, no respect. It only helped that I'd read the next draft of the Ellroy script and it was just awful. I wanted to read some decent words again. And I did want to be close to home for awhile. "Then the next call was from Gillian, after she talked to Vince. And we decided that this was going to piss people off. It was going to piss a lot of people off. Y'know us, we love to piss people off." Carter laughed, helplessly, turning heads in the gate area. "Yeah, it is." "Wait'll you read Vince's idea, we're going to drive people insane." "I think that's our theme for the year." "Oh, hell, yeah, I'm already writing the Mulder-Scully sex scene for ep 4, end of November sweeps, or should we save it for February?" "Let's do two--one in November, one in February. We'll save Doggett-Reyes for May sweeps. Maybe we'll get Skinner someone. They're calling my flight. Order cheese steaks, I'll come straight in from the airport." Chris settled in his first class seat, blissfully alone. He knew the laptop was not charged so he pulled out his pen and the Hawaii notebook he had picked up in the gift shop. Believing in the power of the surfer taming the big wave on the cover, he flipped to the first page and began scribbling in a white heat. ############################ By the time Gillian Anderson arrived at 1013, Vince, David and Kim were sticking index cards to the famous bulletin board, arguing good-naturedly and occasionally typing emails off to Robert in South Africa. "Hi, guys." "Hey, come join in. Did ya read the script?" Vince asked. She smiled her very unScully smile, and then laughed infectiously. "I love it, when can I direct an episode?" "You wanna direct, you gotta plot it yourself," Manners offered. "I'm even working on something." "Isn't that one of the signs of the End Time?" Gillian asked. "Like this whole revival isn't?" asked another voice from the door. Vince recognized him first. "Alex!" Alex Gansa, who had left the production team back in season 3, came into the office. "I heard you guys were looking for talent." "Yeah, so why are you here?" Manners quipped. ######################## Carter looked up from his notebook when the flight attendant put a drink napkin on his tray table. "Something to drink?" "Coffee, please." "What are you working on?" "A script." No need to be coy. "Anything I'd know?" Ah, the hell with it. "The X-Files." "I thought it was you--you're Chris Carter!" A nod. "I love the show, are you working on the movie?" "Not yet. We just got told we're coming back for another season." The attendant smiled. "That's great! I didn't think you should've gone off. I was really beginning to like John and Monica." For the first time since Vince's call, Carter could feel the old enthusiasm rising in him. "Can we talk about it, when you get a minute?" "Sure--let me serve lunch." ############################## It was dark when Chris arrived at 1013's bungalow on the Fox lot. The lights were on and he heard howls and boos as he started up the walkway. The conference area/coffee room was crowded with some of the highest priced talent in LA, throwing popcorn at _Entertainment Tonight_, at Matt Roush, one of their formerly staunchest supporters, running down the show's chances of producing any good work in the fall. Kim Manners lead the hooting. "I predict a bankruptcy for Roush Industries this fall." "Hey, gang, where's the cheese steaks?" "It's Fearless Leader!" David announced. "Tired Fearless Leader." He shook the Hawaii notebook at them. "But I've got some ideas--" "So do we. We've been working all day," Vince said. "And we brought a friend--" He watched his boss goggle at the site of Alex Gansa. "Want some food? The plane food--well, goes without saying," Mary Astoudorian led him to the table. "Well, I actually had a very good meal. Met an X-Files fan, who was really excited that we were coming back. Makes one anyway." "C'mon, get a beer, get a cheese steak, you can tell us your ideas--" Vince decided his boss looked the most vulnerable at that particular moment, and he seized the opportunity. As if on cue, the reunited cast and producers swarmed around Carter while Gilligan brought in the big green board. Then he took a hit off his Rolling Rock, just as Chris opened his. "Who wants to go first?" "Well, my ideas are really weird, so I surrender the floor to you, Vince." "Okay, well, here we go. Once again, in our familiar Friday slot. And you say 'Previously, on The X-Files' and like that first _Buffy_ on UPN, we run through nine years of The X-Files. Then we come up on Mulder and Scully where we left them last--in bed in a motel. But the legend on the screen reads 'Bellefleur, Oregon, May 2000.' " The group held their breath as Carter fairly leapt off his perch on the conference table, and flipped through his notebook. They all stared as he smiled that smile that they all knew meant trouble of the best kind. "I had this dream as I was flying from Australia to Hawaii. I went to sleep thinking how tired I was of the whole damn mythology, and how we sort of got sucked into this because the show kept going on and on. So on the way from Hawaii to here, I wrote it all out. Here's part of what I wrote- -'we restart, all of season 8 and 9 has been a dream, but we keep Doggett and Reyes.' " With a sigh of relief, Vince looked at the rest of his co- conspirators and raised his beer. "Thank you, Jesus," he said softly. "Okay. So when Mulder wakes up from his dream, he and Scully take off back for DC. This time when Krycek and Marita show up, it's with a plan to send CSM away for good and break what's left of the conspiracy." Carter chimed in. "Skinner brings in his old friend John Doggett--or maybe Kersh assigns him to figure out what in the world is going on here." "But that's Part 2, then we bring in Reyes in part 3. This time, they shut down the conspiracy for good. We'll work out the details." "Well, hell, we can just say the rebel aliens win, that they don't want to terrorize us anymore. We can even use the magnetite. But the mytharc ends," Vince said with a flourish. "We drive a stake through its heart," Carter said to himself. "We do say that the aliens influenced our development, though. Well, you seem to have nailed down the opening, what happens after that?" David piped up then. "We have four leads now. So we can play mix and match. That gives us all enough time off--me and Gillian one week, Robert and Annabeth another, or the guys or the girls. And it's all monsters of the week. We can do comedy, horror, just kick out all the jams." "I can do my _Trading Spaces_ crossover," Vince said brightly. "No," everyone said in unison. "Okay." The Entertainment Weekly exclusive in August had no details of the plot, only Carter at his most maddening, acknowledging they were more surprised than anyone at being back, but defiantly insisting that this was going to be a wonderful season and if no one watched, then they were now making the show for themselves. If no one wanted to tune back in, Carter ended the interview: "It's okay. If people don't come back to see us this fall, we'll still be here having a great time. We've gone back to the roots of the show, and everyone here wants to be here. So I think there will be fans who will come back to join us." AUTHOR'S NOTE 2: I enjoyed seasons 8 and 9, especially Doggett (and I came to really love Reyes as well), but there are a few things I'd've done differently. This was inspired by a thread on the XF newsgroup that the finale would reveal that everything had been a dream of Mulder's during "Requiem." I ran with it... I was also damn dog tired of all the bashing of CC and the gang, so I humanized them . Right now, we don't know CC, Vince's or Kim's next jobs. Robert Patrick is working on a movie in South Africa, and David is doing a movie based on James Ellroy's autobiography. Sandy Grushow is the current president of Fox Television Group. Alex Gansa worked on Wolf Lake this fall, but is currently not producing. John Shiban is over at Enterprise and Frank Spotnitz is working on Michael Mann's RHD/LA. Joss Wheddon is the producer of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the new Fox Friday show Firefly, which is the subject of some very bad buzz.