Subj: May Challenge (#2) Date: 5/26/02 7:48:22 PM Central Daylight Time From: laura_c@imagin.net (Doc) To: LaraMeansXF@aol.com This is in response to the X-Infinitum challenge for May. This is option #2, and the story of William is told by William the baby! Thanks Doc Never thought I'd have to say goodbye Author: Doc Category: Vignette, Angst Key Words: William POV, implied MSR, Spoilers: William Summary: Mommy, I love you. Rating: PG Dedication: To Didi, Emily, and Chase. You guys are the thing that keeps me on philing. Note: This story was floating around in my head after seeing William, and I always wondered what the little baby thought. Feedback: Please! We're finally home from grandma's house. Mommy sings quietly to me from the back seat. Boy does she have a good voice. I wish Daddy would come home soon. Mommy cries sometimes, and I know it's about him. How do I know that? Because I can hear her thoughts inside my head. She's worried about me too. She says to Aunt Monica and Uncle John that I'm not like other babies. Mommy says that I'm special. I thought that was supposed to be a good thing, but mommy looked like she was going to cry when she said it. I wonder if we're going to play another game anytime soon. It's the extended version of peek-a-boo where I go away, and mommy always finds me. Then she's really happy when I come back. There's this man standing over me. I feel like I know him. He hears voices inside his head that tell him to do things. Strange things. Things I don't understand. I've got a wet nappy, but I don't want to be impolite, so I just let out a little whimper. He tries to pick me up, and before he does, I hear mommy's footsteps in the hallway. She yells at him, and picks me up. I can feel she's worried. They have a conversation and he asks to hold me. She gives me to him, and I look at this disfigured man with awe. Mommy thinks that this man is daddy. What do I know; I'm just a baby, right? Two days later, he's at my crib again. He gives me something, and it looks like he's got a bottle in his hand, a big long bottle too. I salivate, and try to get him to feed me it. I'm actually really hungry come to think of it. Hey, dude put it in my mouth, not my ear. OWWWWW! He put that in me. It's not a bottle! I WANT MY MOMMEEE!! I wail, I can hear my own voice. It hurts, my brain hurts. It's like everything I've ever gathered from my 11 months of being in this life is being sucked out of me. Mommy comes in and picks me up. Mommy has fear on her mind, and Uncle John has anger. Whatever accusations I had made prior to this, I've come up with one conclusion. This is not my daddy. A day later, mommy is standing with Aunt Monica. I can't read her thoughts anymore. All I can do is look at her blankly and stare. That's no fun! I actually have to be like a normal baby now. The next day, mommy is crying some more. Perhaps she's scared that the bad man will come back. A truck pulls up and a woman gets out that smells funny. She's looking more at me than to mommy as she talks. Then the lady takes me from Mommy. I don't like this. The lady is taking me away. Mommy, stop her. Please, don't let her take me away. I try and say, but of course my young vocal chords aren't developed so it comes out as a cry, and like other babies, once I start crying, I never stop. I look at mommy as the smelly lady carries me to her car. A single tear runs down her cheek as she waves goodbye. Please don't let them take me away again, mommy. I promise I won't spin things anymore. Give me another chance, mommy. I don't want to play this game anymore. I thought I was going to get to say goodbye to Daddy that we'd find him and bring him home together. We were going to be a family again. Mommy, please don't go. Mommy, I love you. Epilogue: Happiness and content fills my heart now. The people I am with love me. I can't read their minds anymore, but I can read their hearts. These people love me, and it might take a while, but I'm growing on them as well. Mommy knew I wasn't safe from those bad people. I have learned that those peek-a-boo games were anything but games at all. I have had a lot of time with my own thoughts (I can only read my own now). I may not see my mother again but she will always be in my heart as will the father I knew for two days. Never will I forget the sacrifice they made. My mother did it out of love, love for me. And that's the memory I will always hold.